10%

About 90% of the time, the thought of my big trip -- all the places I will go, all the things I get to see, the sheer magnitude of it all -- makes me extraordinarily giddy. And yeah, pretty much 100% of the time, I can't quite believe its real and that I am really doing this.

But to be very, very honest and up front? There is the other 10% of the time. It's scary as hell, what I am doing, and every once in a while, it gets to me.

All told, I am going to be on the road for about 7 months. In the scheme of most travel, this is a very long time; in the scheme of most RTW trips that I have read about, this is nothing; it's barely a trip. I have actually deliberately avoided discussing my itinerary with hard-core RTW enthusiasts because I am not taking off for three years to wander planless in India and Peru with nothing but a bandanna and a wicking shirt. But the length of my trip came from partially practical reasons (what I could afford, what I needed/wanted to be at home for, etc) and by emotional ones (how I could best balance everywhere I wanted to go with how long I could be gone before I would start to feel overwhelmed, lonely or homesick). So 7 months it is.

I will have some company in at least two places (and I am working on people for maybe a couple of more), plus I am taking at least one tour for a couple of weeks. And of course, I am likely to meet people here and there, which will keep things interesting. But by and large, it's all me, on my own, which can be a bit intimidating at times.

In general, I am a fairly solitary person who does not mind being alone. When I was living by myself in Los Angeles, my idea of a perfect weekend as to essentially do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, which usually included some yoga, some running around, and a whole lot of my futon and my TiVo.

So what will happen to this lazy, solitary homebody out on the road for umpteen weeks? I honestly have no idea, and sometimes I worry. I worry that my constant efforts to stay on budget will wear me out; I worry that trying to see so much in so many places will make me feel tired or isolated; I worry that bouncing from continent to continent will make me feel disconnected from my life and my home and my family. And I worry that some combination of the above or something unforeseen will cause me to go all introvert hermit-like; wouldn't it be terrible to miss some city because I miss my TiVo?

It is an awesome TiVo, though.

But to be fair, like I said,, this is a 10%-problem; the rest of the time I am convinced that what I am doing is and will be the most awesome thing I ever do in my life, and that whatever happens, I'll handle it.